This one's special.

34th birthday

Y'see, on my thirty-fourth birthday, my friends threw a party for me. I was told it was fancy dress, so I dressed up. Had a tie and a top hat and everything.

And when I walked in through the door, everyone jumped out and yelled SURPRISE! Y'know, kinda like this:


And yes, one guy was even wearing a condom.

Now, that party didn't go quite the same way Max's did - the condom in question didn't actually get used - but it was still the sort of party in which pictures are not taken. Except these pictures of delicious, delicious cake, of course.

And yes, I ate Ellen's ass.

34th birthday