You trying to tell me how to raise my child?!

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Re: You trying to tell me how to raise my child?!

Postby Horizon » Wed Sep 11, 2013 5:27 pm

Tangentially relevant, I've today started a blog in which I complain about my parents as a venting mechanism for the contempt because I've got nobody to talk about it with. Link in my profile.
Pronouns: Active/Passive/Possessive: They/Them/Their.
Orientation: Asexual
Likes their partners the way they like their coffee: they don't like coffee.

Writes a Homestuck/Worm crossover called Hope Springs Eternal, on Spacebattles.
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Re: You trying to tell me how to raise my child?!

Postby RyukaTana » Wed Sep 11, 2013 6:56 pm

Horizon, that sucks majorly. Honestly, I am kind of amused that you think cutting your parents off is some 'last resort'. I spent plenty of my teenage years hoping my dad would hit me so I had a reason to beat his ass. I'm glad he never did, because while he was a shitty father, he's not a bad person. That's tangential, and by no means is it my way of marginalizing your problems or apologizing for the actions of your parents who I do not know. What I'm saying is, I know the feeling, and seriously, once you've achieved full independence, fuck them. You don't owe them shit, no matter what anyone tells you.

Seriously, if someone (them, your siblings, or anyone else) wants to guilt you by suggesting they gave you life and paid your way, don't let that shit get to you. That wasn't a choice they made for your benefit. They didn't know you when they made it, and once they did, you were a responsibility. Obligatory love isn't love at all. Maybe they genuinely do care about you, but if fear and shame is how they try to 'keep you in line', I wouldn't take that to mean much.

I know it's a small comfort now, but you need to focus on you, and start making a plan. Decide how you're going to get out of a shitty situation, and if that means sticking it out like a bitch, do it. I wish there were a more hopeful answer, but generally, there isn't. It doesn't 'get better', you make it better, and even then, you might not. Expect the worst and hope for the best, and tough it out. Whatever you may think of me so far, I'm here for someone in need best I can be. If you need to chat, tell me. You might not like what I have to say, but the virtue of that is you can always stop chatting with me.

Anyway, good luck either way. I'll keep an eye on your blog, I know it sucks to feel unheard.
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Re: You trying to tell me how to raise my child?!

Postby Alex Starkiller » Wed Sep 11, 2013 8:16 pm

Once I get enough money to sustain myself, I'm certainly never talking to my father ever again.
Down dirty bitches, becoming the witches
Grindin' up and down 'cause they grantin' all my wishes
Bring out all my aces like this game was Poker
Banish all the witches, thank you based Madoka!
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Re: You trying to tell me how to raise my child?!

Postby Horizon » Thu Sep 12, 2013 11:40 pm

Well the thing is, they're normally fine. It's just that, I've had four sisters and no brothers, and their methods that served them well before aren't working here. It might just be gender stuff(psychologically inclined individuals may be nodding at this or shaking their heads) or it could be that I'm sort of growing up in a different generation than my sisters did; the youngest is a full 7 years ahead of me. It could be many things, but ultimately, it might be that speaking to adults other than them about what life is like has shifted my perspective to where I can't simply go back to doing pointless wastes of time without dying on the inside, but not quite to the point where I can see the whole forest. Just... that the apple tree I'm in isn't a very good apple tree.
Pronouns: Active/Passive/Possessive: They/Them/Their.
Orientation: Asexual
Likes their partners the way they like their coffee: they don't like coffee.

Writes a Homestuck/Worm crossover called Hope Springs Eternal, on Spacebattles.
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