I Side With's 2016 Election Quiz.

[Horizon]

Please for the love of god vote for Hillary. This year is not a time to vote third party. Do you remember what happened in 2000? Because we really don't want that happening again.

[Killjoy]

I refuse to choose between a crap sandwich and a poop sandwich.

[Horizon]

It's more like the choice between tofu and a scorpion. Do you really want the tofu? No, but you sure as fuck don't want the scorpion, so eat the goddamn tofu.

[Killjoy]

It's more like the choice between tofu and a scorpion. Do you really want the tofu? No, but you sure as fuck don't want the scorpion, so eat the goddamn tofu.

At best, it's a choice between a master villain and a cartoon villain -- at least the master villain (Hillary) won't do the dumbest thing possible in critical moments.

[Horizon]

Hillary isn't a "master villain," she's a selfish woman who is currently, out of enlightened self-interest, espousing the policies of the Democratic party. Which I am pretty alright with, considering the other option is Donald Goddamn Trump.

Okay, sure, Hillary will probably be a bad president, but America can survive a bad president, it's done it before. It has never been through a Donald Trump, though, and you know, call it cynical or whatever, but we should probably do whatever we can to keep from finding out how our country does under Donald Trump. Those of us who aren't straight white dudes will very much appreciate the effort.

[crayzz]

Okay, sure, Hillary will probably be a bad president, but America can survive a bad president, it's done it before.

Is this even true? She's probably gonna be Obama 2.0. Most of the complaints about her are either mundane or trumped up. Hell she has a voting record very similar to Bernie.

[Killjoy]

Okay, sure, Hillary will probably be a bad president, but America can survive a bad president, it's done it before.

Is this even true? She's probably gonna be Obama 2.0. Most of the complaints about her are either mundane or trumped up. Hell she has a voting record very similar to Bernie.

Really?

Every time someone says "vote for Hillary to stick to the corrupt, the wealthy, and wall street fat cats", irony meters everywhere peg out.

She's been cozy as hell with Wall Street for years, and she's corrupt as hell. She's a soulless opportunistic lying sack of crap. She has a highly selective concept of which individual human rights the goverment should bother to recognize and abide by. She fully supported corporate welfare for the insurance industry and mandatory individual purchases to fund it.

The only reason I would ever consider voting for her is because of Trump (or someone like him) running for the other major mafia.

[crayzz]

Yes, really.

She's been cozy as hell with Wall Street for years,[1] and she's corrupt as hell.[2] She's a soulless opportunistic lying sack of crap[3]. She has a highly selective concept of which individual human rights the goverment should bother to recognize and abide by.[4] She fully supported corporate welfare for the insurance industry and mandatory individual purchases to fund it.[5]

1) Mundane
2) Unsubstantiated
3) Shit flinging
4) Unsubstantiated AND vague, though potentially interesting if clarified and subtantiated
5) Mundane

[Killjoy]

Yes, really.

She's been cozy as hell with Wall Street for years,[1] and she's corrupt as hell.[2] She's a soulless opportunistic lying sack of crap[3]. She has a highly selective concept of which individual human rights the goverment should bother to recognize and abide by.[4] She fully supported corporate welfare for the insurance industry and mandatory individual purchases to fund it.[5]

1) Mundane
2) Unsubstantiated
3) Shit flinging
4) Unsubstantiated AND vague, though potentially interesting if clarified and subtantiated
5) Mundane

If corruption, dishonesty, and crass opportunism are "mundane", then you might as well vote for Trump.

[Horizon]

At least Hillary's extreme self-interest is enlightened enough to toe the party line. Besides, a government with Hillary at the helm is one where Sanders and Warren can still get some stuff done. One with Trump at the helm? Nnnnot so much.