0028-------------------------------------

(Friday. INT: apartment, EB is returning home.)

EB: Hello? Jamie, you up?
JH (in kitchen): Oh, hey! You're back earlier than I expected. I hope you don't mind, I assumed you'd want some protein after your workout, so I went ahead and made an egg white ham and asparagus omelette.
---------------
JH: But then I didn't know if the person I didn't meet was going to be coming back with you, so I made another one with cherry tomatoes, spinach, and basil. And then I thought maybe that was a little too healthy, and maybe you just wanted to reward yourself instead, so I used the egg yolks to do like a French toast kind of thing with those mini-croissants.
---------------
JH: ...but then I remembered we don't actually have any maple syrup, and that fake corn syrup table syrup stuff is just a crime against nature, so I remixed the French toast croissants into a sort of cinnamon caramel brownie thing, but it's not done yet, and I can't really look down so I may have dropped some of the batter stuff on the floor, you might have to check for me I'm sorry.
---------------
EB (muttering): Goddamnit, I'm either going to gain twenty pounds or lose twenty bucks.
JH: What?
EB: (louder): Nothing!