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(Friday. INT: apartment)

(EB and JH are still playing RPS Chess while talking)
EB: What about fucking AT me?
JH: I think that would be if I were having sex with someone else on the other side of the room, but just staring at you the whole damn time.
EB: Oh God.
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EB: How about fucking TO me?
JH: Easy. I lay my hypothetical ladyfriend down on a skateboard, and just thrust my way across the floor in your general direction.
EB: Very romantic.
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EB: Fucking ON me?
JH: Oh, that one's easiest of all. My ladyfriend and I bring an extra mattress in while you're asleep, flop it down over you, and proceed to have sex on top of your pinned body.
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EB: Can we at least agree you can't fuck IN me?
JH: Well, not without the aid of some sort of shrink ray...