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Ellen may have forgotten, but you all remembered, didn't you?

Now, this comic may make it seem like I'm slamming on fanfic, but I'm not. Fanfic is great. Fanfic is one of the natural outputs of fandom, a normal result of passion, and is often fantastic writing on its own terms. Much of the greatest works in the English language are, technically, fanfic. Heck, one could make the argument that the New Testament is fanfic of the Old, and Jesus is the ultimate Mary Sue character. There is a lot of fanfiction available on the Internet that is very very very good quality writing.

That is not the fanfic that Max found.

(Saturday evening, INT: EB and JH's living room, dark)

EB: Aw, shit, I completely forgot...
MH: You said if I wrote as much sci fi as Lily that you'd GM in your bridesmaid dress!
EB: ...the fuck? There's no way you-
MH (handing over her tablet): Read it and weep. Or don't read it, it's long, just skim it.
MH: Weeping is also not the preferred reaction, come to think of it.
EB (checking the document): One thousand six hundred and two pages... over four hundred thousand words?!? How the hell did you-
MH: The magic of Find-Replace, my friend. I looked up all the trashiest, smuttiest, wankiest, most Mary-Sueish Mary-Sue fan fiction I could find, and swapped nouns and adjectives around until it's all about the same girl. That is a single story about a single character right there.
EB: A single story that can't possibly make coherent sense.
MH: Hey, I don't recall you saying it had to be good science fiction.