First Comic Previous Comic Random Comic Next Comic Current Comic
First Comic Previous Comic Random Comic Next Comic Current Comic

I'm gonna talk about two cop movies here: Dirty Harry and Zootopia. Specifically, responses to those movies that bug me.

You know what bugs me about Dirty Harry? The fact that it got sequels. Not even the fact that Harry Callahan is in other movies, necessarily, but the fact that in those movies Harry is still a cop. That's the point of the final scene of the movie, damn it! Hell, it's right there in the title!

Harry is dirty, he's too dirty to be a policeman. Like a fallen paladin, he forsakes his oath and his job description in favour of saving the day - he shoots Scorpio, but throws his badge into the water. He was forced to weigh Good against Law, and though his choice makes him the hero of the film, it is clear that he cannot continue as a police officer thereafter.

I dunno, maybe he finds a tenth-level cleric to cast Atonement on him some time before the events in Magnum Force.

Jamie was correct in his first assessment of Cheryla - whether or not she's Good is up for debate, but she's definitely Lawful - or, at least, Lawful enough to know when she's not being Lawful.

Zootopia, as of this writing, is too new to have a sequel, but it does have fanfiction and fanart and such, and what bugs me here is people shipping Judy Hopps and Nick Wilde.

Yes, in fanfiction, you're free to ship whomever you please with whomever else you please (personally, I think Cap would have a better shot at a healthy relationship with Falcon than with Bucky, passionate lingering glances notwithstanding), but I do think that pairing Nick and Judy is downright incorrect.

Zootopia is a buddy cop film! They're unlikely partners! Understanding the genre of Zootopia helps us to understand the relationship between its protagonists, and while that relationship is affectionate and turbulent and dynamic and intense, it does not include a litter of baby fuxxits.

Yes, that's what a cross between a fox and a rabbit would be called. That or a rabbox, and that just doesn't have the same ring to it.

I have to wonder if as many people would ship Nick and Judy if the movie were the same, line for line, shot for shot, but if they were both male or both female. Men and women can be platonic friends, damn it!

Anyway, word-of-God authour speaking, here, you guys - Jamie and Cheryl have a unique and intense relationship, but it is not and will not be sexual or romantic in nature, despite the fact that, yes, they're both heterosexual. That can happen. I believe the Greek term is agape.

That being said, now it's time to switch scenes and go see the relationship in which the ostensibly inevitable did happen.

(Wednesday night, INT, hallway outside ChA's apartment.)

ChA (offpanel): Hey, Jamie!
ChA: Just so you know, I talked with some people at the precinct.
ChA: They... I could get my job back. Not the same job. But it'd be a desk job with regular hours and I'd be making twice what I do at the Capsaicin Lounge.
JH: Oh. Uh... congratulations. I guess I'll see you ar-
ChA: Yeah, except I think I can't take it now.
JH: Wh- but...
ChA: There's this oath they make you take - or re-take, in my case - and... and I can't do that now. So that's that.
-------------- JH: Oh God, Cheryl, I-
ChA: Hey, I believe I told you to go the hell home. It's past midnight, some of us need sleep before we handle knives tomorrow. G'night, Halliganiv.
JH: ...Good night, Cheryla.